Two Years, Two Weeks and a World of Wonder

My sweet little boy turns two today. Two years have passed by in the blink of an eye and yet I can’t even imagine my life without him. Keagan is so full of joy, so vibrant, so spirited, so energetic, so life-affirming, so … Keagan! My life has become more worth living because of his sweet presence. I am so very blessed to be “mama” to such a wonderful child.

His little sister is two weeks old today. I am also shocked to realize that sweet little Eden has blessed us with her presence for two weeks. Our wonderful little family is so full of love and joy.

Today is Easter. Such a special, beautiful day. Easter is filled with so much hope. It amazes me to think about the love of the Father and the miracle of Christ rising. We’re all given the beautiful gift of forgiveness because of the amazing grace of our Heavenly Father. There is so much beauty and joy in the miracle we celebrate today. Enjoy it. Embrace it. Bask in its beauty. Marvel in its joint wonder and simplicity.

Since today is Easter, we’ll be spending the day focusing on that. We’re having a birthday celebration for the little guy in a few weeks. I hope everyone has a blessed day!

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Slow-Moving Grump

Keagan is such a wonderful little guy. So much personality, so full of love.

I feel badly, because these days, it is VERY hard for me to keep up with him. He’s been more of a Papa’s boy lately, probably because I am a slow-moving grump who cringes when he wants to play. I am not proud of it, but it is true. I had a terrible morning today. For whatever reason, I’ve been super nauseated (I keep hoping it means labor will come soon, but so far that is not the case) and when I woke up today I felt huge waves of nausea with every movement. It was awful. So awful that my wonderful husband stayed home and let me sleep some, hoping it would make it better or that labor would come. Sleep helped some and hubby went to work two hours late.

Then I was alone with my sweet son. Who is very much so a toddler. Cute, funny, defiant, curious. The whole package. I still felt awful (I am nine months pregnant, I guess I should feel awful, but I was feeling especially awful and he was especially playful. He wanted to run around and play and I secretly hoped he would just sit still and color, play with legos, even watch TV (which I hate!) but none of that would do.

He kept begging to go to the park and eventually, I obliged. And I am glad I did. The fresh air felt good. He had a blast playing with another little boy his age. He got to pet a puppy. Then something amazing happened. When all the children and puppies were gone, his slow-moving grump of a mama actually played with him! I chased him. I let him chase me. I even pulled my huge and tired body onto the big toy and went down the slide with him. I carried him home when he asked to go home for “munch,” and I didn’t complain when he wanted to cuddle to sleep for his nap.

He was so happy as he went to sleep. He kept patting me and saying “ssshhh” like he was putting me down for a nap and leaning in and kissing me. Occasionally, he’d sigh and say “ahhh, Mama.”

I am so glad I gave him some happy mama time after my morning of being grumpy. Shoot, my week of being grumpy. I know this has to be hard on him. He just wants his mama to play with him. And he does not understand the strain that being very, very pregnant puts on a body. He just knows his mama used to play a lot more than she does now. Yes, I am tired from being so active at the park and I’m having contractions still, hours later from it (No, I don’t think it’s labor…) but it was more than worth it.

In these last days/weeks before Eden’s arrival I am going to have to remember that his little world is being shaken up and no matter how hard it is on me, he needs his mama present. And I need to remember how much I truly love playing with him. He’s so sweet, cute and loving. How could I not love that?

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Counting Down the Days…

We’ll only be staying three more nights with my parents! Then we’ll be in our new place that I love oh so much. And we can get back to our routine. Keagan really needs that structure…especially with the baby coming. So much is going to change for him! And soon! I am 34 1/2 weeks pregnant…maybe more depending on which due date I want to follow. I just hope we have time to settle in before sweet little Eden makes her first appearance.

I hope I can make the transition as smooth as possible for Keagan. I don’t want him to feel like we love him less or anything like that. 😦 Poor little man is used to having Mama and Papa to himself. But I know he will adore his little sister.

Speaking of the sweet little man, he just woke up so I am done blogging for now 🙂

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If Only…

If only I could capture the wonderful moments of mama-hood in time to look back upon forever…

If only I could save these precious times and replay them over and over again…

If only I could save the warm feeling in my heart as he reached up to touch my cheek…

If only I could save these times, I’d be so grateful.

Instead I will try to remember. I hope I always remember the soft touch of his little hand patting my arm as I rocked him to sleep.  I hope that I can always remember the warm kisses he gave my arm as I held him, singing “At the Foot of the Cross” to him. I hope I always remember the sweet smell of his blond curls as he nestled into me. I hope I will always remember how his arms felt around my neck as he threw them around me for another hug. I hope I will always remember that sweet, toothy smile he gave me while looking up into my eyes. I hope I will always remember the peace I felt rocking that sweet boy. I hope I always remember the sweetness in his voice as he said “Ni-night” and pointed his little finger over to his crib.

I hope, I pray that these sweet memories stay with me forever. May I never forget the happiness my sweet Keagan brings me and the love that mama and son share.

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Sick, busy and still very blessed!

It’s been a very busy few days!

My little guy is not feeling well. Yesterday he had a runny nose, fever, diarrhea and was teething.In addition to this, our neighbors decided to be really loud and kept waking him up. It was a LONG night. This am, the fever went away. I was hoping it was all teething related. Then, tonight he started a barky cough. After a few hours of this, my husband and I realized it was croup. We’ve been through this once before. We had him sit in the bathroom while we let the shower and sink run hot water. It helped some, but the poor dear is so wound up he can’t stay asleep. I can’t wait for him to feel better.

Earlier in the day, when he was feeling fine and acting normal, he went to see his grandparents. When he did this, hubby and I went shopping. First to Goodwill. I love that place. We bought a ton of clothes for Eden, a wooden toy ferry boat for Keagan, a book for Keagan and some adult T-shirts to make pants out of for the kids. All for $16. Thrifting rocks. It was fun to pick out clothes for the little one inside of me. Mostly, I bought simple shirts on which I can add embellishments and embroidery. I am really enjoying embroidery these days.

After that, we went to the fabric store. We were just going to pick up some elastic for the t-shirt pants, but they were having an awesome sale. 50% off some of the sewing machines. We realized after playing with mine, that it is missing several pieces and that is why I can’t get the tension right. So we were contemplating buying a new one anyway. I’d planned on a simple machine. BUT the better machines were on such a good sale that they were close in price to the more basic models. So we got a computerized Singer that has 60 stitches, an embroidery alphabet and several other cool features. I already made half a pair of t-shirt pants on it and I love it. I can’t wait to play with it more! I think I would have whipped out all four pairs we have planned if it hadn’t been for Keagan not feeling well. If he stays asleep now, I will at least finish the one pair tonight. They are super easy, and coming from a girl who was afraid of sewing machines until tonight, that is  saying a lot!  I will post some photos when they are done.

Well little man is still asleep, hopefully for some time now. Poor baby boy.  I am going to go try out the pants.

If anyone reading this happens to know of some home remedies for croup, please let me know!

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Hooray for “K”

So I don’t really push my son to learn to read or anything of that sort. He’s young and I know he’ll learn. But today he learned a few letters because he kept asking me to draw for him and I ran out of ideas. So I wrote a “k” for Keagan. He picked up on it really quickly. So I did a few more. Now he knows four letters and he learned in in five minutes or so. It seems to have stuck. He is happily pointing out “k’s” to me.

Now I feel torn. I am all about natural, child-led learning. But he so enjoyed learning his letters this way. Maybe since he is enjoying it, it is child-led in a way?

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Cars and Cows and Guitars, Oh My!

So I thought I would sort of “review” some of Keagan’s Christmas gifts.

He got the “Blue Moo” CD by Sandra Boynton from my mom. Keagan LOVES music, and I want to make sure he has some music time every day, so this was a great gift. We played it today for the first time. A few of the tracks bored him a bit, but, for the most part it had him dancing all over the house. He waved his little hands in the air, he marched, he even pulled out his little toy drum and played along (to the beat, I must add… er brag.) So, minus a few songs that are fine, just not Keagan’s Taste, we loved it. It’s much easier to listen to than a lot of kids music (I can’t STAND little kids singing off key!!) and a lot of fun.

Also from my mom, he got Melissa and Doug “Stacking Emergency Vehicles.” These are also a hit. They are toy car meets puzzle. He loves pushing them around yelling “we-oooh-we-oooh” and also taking them apart and putting them together. He has a little trouble with the puzzle aspect, but he enjoys it and I think he’ll grow into them a bit more with age, which is a good thing. So many toys get boring to kids too quicky.

The third and final toy I am reviewing today is the “Funrise My Little Rockstar Guitar.” While Keagan likes it, I don’t think he will for long. It’s already breaking! It has a wheel on the front that makes it make guitar sound effects. This wheel is already stuck. He’s played with it four times and it’s already stuck! It’s also annoying and does not really resmble a guitar in the way it’s used. I want to expose him to music, but in a more realistic fashion. And one that does not beep, light up and break in less than a week. I generally like more natural toys and this just reminded me why.

And just because, here’s a photo of my little guy, playing in the laundry I was trying to fold. Who needs toys when you have a laundry basket?!

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Reflection and Resolution

Well I can’t believe that 2008 is coming to a close. It’s shocking really.

A lot has happened this year. When the year started, we were so afraid of having another baby after Keagan’s traumatic birth that we thought we’d never have one.  We thought we’d probably have the husband get the “big v” and think about adoption.  Thankfully, a friend convinced me to at least TALK with a midwife about the possibility of getting pregnant.  And I did. I talked to a wonderful midwife and we’re so happy we did. We talked about all that went wrong last time, and how to prevent it this time. The OBGYN group I saw was not about prevention at all… they only acted after something went wrong.

So after talking with the midwife, we decided to start to try to conceive. We thought it would take months -I was still nursing and my cycles were anything but regular. On the midwife’s recommendation, I picked up “Taking Charge of Your Fertility” (and happened to find it at Goodwill for $2! I love thrift shopping!)  and we got pregnant on the first cycle! Even the midwife was shocked to see how quickly I was pregnant!

So thanks to all of that, our sweet Eden will be here sometime near April 4th. And we are very grateful for that. This pregnancy has not been full of any of the problems I faced with Keagan’s. I am visualizing a wonderful, peaceful water birth in a birth center and feel that I will be able to achieve that. And  I think that Keagan will benefit greatly from having a sister to share his childhood with.

Another big change this year came after reading Shane Claiborne’s book, “The Irresistable Revolution.” It really changed how we thought about a lot of things. It’s from a Christian perspective, but I suggest it to anyone and everyone. It’s about humanity;  it’s about love; it is about how human beings should treat one another. It made me think about things I’d never considered before. Now, because of this book, I am not afraid of the homeless. I am not afraid to try and help people in need. We’ve also simplified our lives quite a bit. I’ve gotten really into thrifting after reading about how badly child laborers are treated. I don’t want to support the companies that hurt those kids, plus it is great knowing that I am reusing materials that could have otherwise been thrown away. It brought on a lot of changes for our family, all for the good. When  a friend recommended it to be the first time, I was pregnant with Keagan and just didn’t have the attention span. I am glad I went back to it later.

My husband took a lower paying job this year, but it was a step in the right direction. He’s in a feild that he wants to be in, his job is secure, and he’s moving up quickly within his office. It was a scary choice to make, but it was the right one.

Keagan has changed so much this year. He was a baby when the year started. As the year closes, I have to admit that he’s much more of a little boy than a baby. He’s smart, funny and full of life. What more could a mama ask for?

We also moved this year. Our new home is much smaller, but much better suited for us. It’s kind of in the middle of nowhere, but that’s okay for now. We do toy around with the idea of living in Tacoma, where my husband works. I always thought I was a country girl, but more urban living really seems appealing to us right now. I think that is a change 2009 will bring for us.

All that said, I am ready for our new year and the many new challenges and changes it will surly bring. I am a little nervous about being a mama to TWO kiddos, but I think I am up to it. I kind of have to be, don’t I? 🙂

I have quite a few goals for 2009

1. Read the Bible. All of it. It’s not as if I’ve never picked it up before, I’ve read most of it, many parts over and over again. But I want to read it all and I want to make sure I am doing it every day.

2. Get Organised! My dirty little secret (or not so secret if you know me in real life) is that I am a TERRIBLE hosuekeeper. I will not let this be the case anymore. I won’t! If anyone has any motivation and organisation tips, please let me know!

3. Quit being scared of my sewing machine! I KNOW I can use the thing. I am capable. I need to realize it.

4. Complete 40 craft projects. I love to craft. But I never do it, or I start and don’t finish. I want to do about one a week, giving my self space to take time off with the new baby and to have some projects that are bigger and therefore take longer. I am going to quit drooling over other people’s creations and make my own!

5. Get out more! I’ve been in mama isolation too long. I love my son, but I need to get out. With a second one coming, this is going to be even more important. I am to the point where I get out so rarely that I become awkward in social settings sometimes. EEK. I need to get out. With the kids or without.

6. Get back into my charity work. I was doing great for awhile, but the move, the pregnancy, the holidays etc all got in my way. But that’s no excuse. People are still hungry out there!

7. Find more natural learning activities for Keagan. He is so smart and he just eats this stuff up. I need to nurture his little mind.  I am not talking about flash cards and drilling information into him here. I am talking more about Montessori inspired, child-led activities that will help nurture his learning and creativity.By the end of the year, we will probably be working on a bit more, still child led as he will be preschool aged and we’re going to homeschool him. I have a feeling, however that it will be leaning to the side of unschooling, at least for his early childhood.

8. Be a better cook. I really fall short in most things related to home making, so this is another goal I am going to be working on. I hate processed foods, yet I get lazy and use them anyway. I’d like to stop that!

That’s all I can think of at the moment. Maybe I should stop it there for now anyway. Don’t want to set myself up to fail 🙂

What are your goals this year? Have any tips for me to help accomplish mine?

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Christmas with a Toddler

Keagan’s second out-of womb Christmas was nice. He woke up in a sweet and cheerful mood. I made him breakfast and he ate it in bed with Papa while I got everything ready in the living room. Then I read him two board books about the real meaning of Christmas and we went into the living room. He instantly saw and ran to his new toys. They were mostly bigger, so only one was wrapped. He got an easel, a table and chairs I painted with his and Eden’s names, a felt board with embroidered shapes I made for him and a stuffed puppy I threw in at the last minute. I put the puppy in the tree because he had spent the last two weeks trying to “decorate” the tree with his toys. He squealed with excitement when he saw it there. Then he pulled it out and kissed it. Totally worth the 50 cents at Goodwill. 🙂

From there, we went to my parents and enjoyed time with them, my brothers and their girlfriends. We exchanged gifts and Keagan got spoiled, but I guess a little bit of spoiling won’t kill him a few times a year 🙂 I am quite excited about the gift my little bro gave me – a night out while he babysits! Score! Keagan really loved the Larry the Cucumber stuffed toy my parents got him.

After that we went to the inlaws, where we ate dinner and exchanged gifts yet again. So yes, he got a LOT of stuff.

We had a few not so grand moments involving our car getting stuck in the snow (one time for 40 minutes!) but in the end, it was a great holiday and I am so glad to have been able to share it with my family.

I’ll post some photos later. I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas filled with love and reverence for the Baby born in Bethlehem.

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Fingerpainting for Christmas

Keagan made some finger paintings for family members this Christmas. After he painted them, we traced his little handprint on them. They came out quite cute, but I think the process may have been even more cute!

Unfortunatly, I forgot to take a photo of a finished handprint fingerpainting before I gave them all away.

He is really loving art these days, so I will be sure to do more art projects with him. He got an easel for Christmas (and I will blog about his Christmas soon!) and he is loving it!

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